Monday, October 23, 2006
GEPHARDT GETS A POSSE
FAREMOUNT. After skipping another dose of his Fluoxitine and Morphine, Fuhrer Sheriff Vlad Gephardt creates another branch of his ever growing sheriff's office. The Moon Valley Posse.
From the pages of yesteryear, riding high on the steed of justice, the county of Moon Valley will no longer be scourged by the heathen and the meth addict. Sheriff Vlad is taking applications for a volunteer mounted posse for 2007.
The volunteers have to provide their own horse, pass a background check, go to Gross Lutheran Church, have never been divorced, kiss major sheriff arse, and pay $50 for membership. They will in turn received the Moon Valley nazi-brown uniform, and the right to plunder and pillage at will. Turn in every terrorist suspect, meth addict, half-breed, and democrat.
"It will bring back the nostalgia of mob mentality." Gephardt smiles, "The posse will be patroling our citywide garage sales, you know what kind of crime garagesales breed! Also, the Moon Valley Fair, and that pinko commie 'Cornstock' those peace loving idiots in Chunnell started. We'll put an end to their hippie dealings but quick!"
Dog catcher extrodinaire, Craig Fowlest, will be responsible for cleaning up horse "apples" in the city limits.
From the pages of yesteryear, riding high on the steed of justice, the county of Moon Valley will no longer be scourged by the heathen and the meth addict. Sheriff Vlad is taking applications for a volunteer mounted posse for 2007.
The volunteers have to provide their own horse, pass a background check, go to Gross Lutheran Church, have never been divorced, kiss major sheriff arse, and pay $50 for membership. They will in turn received the Moon Valley nazi-brown uniform, and the right to plunder and pillage at will. Turn in every terrorist suspect, meth addict, half-breed, and democrat.
"It will bring back the nostalgia of mob mentality." Gephardt smiles, "The posse will be patroling our citywide garage sales, you know what kind of crime garagesales breed! Also, the Moon Valley Fair, and that pinko commie 'Cornstock' those peace loving idiots in Chunnell started. We'll put an end to their hippie dealings but quick!"
Dog catcher extrodinaire, Craig Fowlest, will be responsible for cleaning up horse "apples" in the city limits.
