Thursday, March 24, 2005
Lost Bird Battles Demons
Shakopee. Everyone has their own personal demons, and if they tell you they don't, then they're liars and should be punched in the face, beaten with a bar stool, kicked in the head twice, thrown down a flight of stairs, kicked again and then spit on.
At any point, it was quite a few years back, I had come out of a bad relationship in Omaha, NE. I moved back to Minnesota to get my head straight. So I hook up with this old friend of mine who also plays guitar. He tells me he's a "born again" christian. I'm thinking, "Cool, religion is something I need right now." So we jam out to some of the old tunes we used to do before he was converted. Then he suggests some bible study, I'm thinking that would be okay, too. What could that hurt?
Well, a few weeks later, he asks me if I want to play some guitar with his pastor. I'm thinking, "A pastor who rocks out on guitar? Cool." So one Thursday night we go to my friends church. It's actually an old house that has been gutted and converted into a church. Symbolizing maybe a person being gutted and converted into a christian? Hmmmm, I smell metaphor.
At any rate, I notice the pastor has no guitar and there are several other people there just hanging out in a group, giving me a stare every once in awhile. A guy doesn't have to be a "talent" to know something wasn't kosher.
The Pastor sits me in a plastic chair across from him. Our knees touching. I'm looking at my "friend" asking what this was all about.
The Pastor asks me a few questions about the type of music I listen to, the lifestyle I was living, and then proceeds to tell me that he beleives I'm possessed by demons. I tell him he's crazy and stand up to leave, the group of people there at the church close in a circle around us, my friend just standing there by me. I'm ready to fill the proverbial pants by now.
I sit down figuring I'll just go through the motions and leave when they're satisfied that I'm not possessed. The group calms down and sits, "praying" or "chanting" something that wasn't comprehensive, the pastor was asking me what my name was over and over again. Then, I felt like I was being removed from my body and I blacked out.
When I came to, I was lying on my side with puke all over me and my stomach felt like someone had kicked me several times there.
Well, I got up and left, walked about 8 miles towards my apartment until someone stopped and gave me a ride the rest of the way.
Never went there again, and took me awhile to walk into another church again.
I must be a "demon" magnet, because my ex-wife says my new girlfriend is possessed by demons, I'm possessed by demons, and my ex-in-laws keep sending me bible verses in the mail. I even got a copy of "Passion of the Christ" from them, I sent it back to them and they sent it back to me.
I don't have anything against Christianity, or any religion for that matter, I just don't beleive it should be shoved down our throats.
At any point, it was quite a few years back, I had come out of a bad relationship in Omaha, NE. I moved back to Minnesota to get my head straight. So I hook up with this old friend of mine who also plays guitar. He tells me he's a "born again" christian. I'm thinking, "Cool, religion is something I need right now." So we jam out to some of the old tunes we used to do before he was converted. Then he suggests some bible study, I'm thinking that would be okay, too. What could that hurt?
Well, a few weeks later, he asks me if I want to play some guitar with his pastor. I'm thinking, "A pastor who rocks out on guitar? Cool." So one Thursday night we go to my friends church. It's actually an old house that has been gutted and converted into a church. Symbolizing maybe a person being gutted and converted into a christian? Hmmmm, I smell metaphor.
At any rate, I notice the pastor has no guitar and there are several other people there just hanging out in a group, giving me a stare every once in awhile. A guy doesn't have to be a "talent" to know something wasn't kosher.
The Pastor sits me in a plastic chair across from him. Our knees touching. I'm looking at my "friend" asking what this was all about.
The Pastor asks me a few questions about the type of music I listen to, the lifestyle I was living, and then proceeds to tell me that he beleives I'm possessed by demons. I tell him he's crazy and stand up to leave, the group of people there at the church close in a circle around us, my friend just standing there by me. I'm ready to fill the proverbial pants by now.
I sit down figuring I'll just go through the motions and leave when they're satisfied that I'm not possessed. The group calms down and sits, "praying" or "chanting" something that wasn't comprehensive, the pastor was asking me what my name was over and over again. Then, I felt like I was being removed from my body and I blacked out.
When I came to, I was lying on my side with puke all over me and my stomach felt like someone had kicked me several times there.
Well, I got up and left, walked about 8 miles towards my apartment until someone stopped and gave me a ride the rest of the way.
Never went there again, and took me awhile to walk into another church again.
I must be a "demon" magnet, because my ex-wife says my new girlfriend is possessed by demons, I'm possessed by demons, and my ex-in-laws keep sending me bible verses in the mail. I even got a copy of "Passion of the Christ" from them, I sent it back to them and they sent it back to me.
I don't have anything against Christianity, or any religion for that matter, I just don't beleive it should be shoved down our throats.
