Thursday, March 24, 2005
Easter Bunny Dead
Prior Lake. The future of the Easter celebration stands in the balance as a child is traumatized by the brutal death of the Easter Bunny.
It was an Easter like any other. The Bootlicker family spent the morning at church, they'd come home to change, and daddy Bootlicker would go inside first to try and catch the Easter Bunny before he hid his son's (Brett Jr.) Easter eggs. Every year proved fruitless until last year when daddy Bootlicker came out to the car holding the one, the only Easter bunny. A floppy-eared albino rabbit with a pink bow around his neck. Unfortunately all the eggs were hidden as Mr. Bootlicker didn't reach the Easter Bunny in time.
This year on Easter, tragedy struck. Coming home from church, the Bootlicker came home to what obviously was a struggle that ended in the demise of the Easter Bunny.
The Easter bunny laid breathing rapidly on the front steps of the Bootlicker household with his throat ripped out.
Brett Jr. sobbed, "This is it, daddy, Easter will never come again!"
The Easter bunny's last words before expiring were, "I was...hi..hiding the eggs, like Brett was all...always (coff coff) used to, then....something...something came at me from behind....it looked like....rrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhh!"
Services for the Easter Bunny were held on Tuesday.
It was an Easter like any other. The Bootlicker family spent the morning at church, they'd come home to change, and daddy Bootlicker would go inside first to try and catch the Easter Bunny before he hid his son's (Brett Jr.) Easter eggs. Every year proved fruitless until last year when daddy Bootlicker came out to the car holding the one, the only Easter bunny. A floppy-eared albino rabbit with a pink bow around his neck. Unfortunately all the eggs were hidden as Mr. Bootlicker didn't reach the Easter Bunny in time.
This year on Easter, tragedy struck. Coming home from church, the Bootlicker came home to what obviously was a struggle that ended in the demise of the Easter Bunny.
The Easter bunny laid breathing rapidly on the front steps of the Bootlicker household with his throat ripped out.
Brett Jr. sobbed, "This is it, daddy, Easter will never come again!"
The Easter bunny's last words before expiring were, "I was...hi..hiding the eggs, like Brett was all...always (coff coff) used to, then....something...something came at me from behind....it looked like....rrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhh!"
Services for the Easter Bunny were held on Tuesday.
